A match made in geeky heaven. We were meant to be.

As I had predicted, I met my husband at Dragon*Con, one of the largest fan-led conventions in the country.

We met in the board gaming room, a passion I began to share with some close friends who introduced me to him, not knowing we would end up together.

Perfect, right?

Well, it turns out our geeky interests varied quite a bit: he’s a Star Trek fan, and I prefer Star Wars. I’m a casual gamer, and he is hardcore. I’m a fan of Harry Potter and he’s…well, not.

geek relationships marriage

So what do you do when your significant other (or any loved one you live with) has geeky tastes that are different than yours?

A few tips:

1) Find common ground. That’s probably the first thing you thought of, right? Don’t forget to factor in variables, like the level of passion for the shared interest.

I can game for two hours and be good for the day. My husband can play 12-15 hours with only potty and food breaks.

We try to make an effort to find games we both enjoy playing, even though he will always be better than me and want to play for much longer.

Some TV shows, like Red Dwarf, I just could not get into. After watching three seasons, he gave up on me loving it as much as him. But we kept at it and discovered we both love IT Crowd, Big Bang Theory and Venture Bros.

Having different interests is at times frustrating. This is why the next tip is super important.

2) Practice patience. Sure, I still am miffed he doesn’t come to bed sometimes until 6 a.m., but you have to look at it from a different perspective – he’s been home all night and he has a passion for something.

In 20 years, these moments won’t matter so much. Please note I used the word “practice.” Not just because it made a cool consonance sound, but also because it really does take work to stay patient with the people you care about.

So even though I am glued to Facebook and he’s hooked on Steam, we try to do something different together. Hence, the final tip:

3) Disconnect together. There have been days where he and I never leave the house. While that’s great sometimes, we know staying isolated and indoors is just not good for the brain or the body.

A geek has got to get out!

I think this has been the toughest for us, because he is more of a homebody than I am. We are still trying to figure out mutual hobbies that don’t involve gaming.

What do you do when your geeky interests clash? Share some tips and also if you have any other geeky relationship queries you want me to tackle.

(P.S.: The photo are of my engagement session by the talented photographer, Jessica Messer. We had a little fun playing on the black/white thing. And, yes, we did play dominoes together.)